The PERFECT Super Bowl Spot

Do you have some spare millions of dollars just laying around? Why don’t you put them to “good” use and buy some air-time during the Super Bowl? It’s not like you’d be getting much more bang-for-your-buck by creating a holistic digital marketing campaign with, I don’t know, maybe a certain modern marketing agency.

Of course not. That’d be ludicrous. Everyone knows that advertising during the Super Bowl is where it’s at, right? I mean, who are we to disagree with the agencies and media companies charging the GDP of a small country for 30 seconds and a catchphrase?

We’re nothing if not helpful at nFusion, so today, we’re going to help you put those millions to good use by helping you create the perfect Super Bowl commercial.

STEP ONE: Defining the Essentials
We’re all about data, so we’ve run the numbers through the mainframe…beep beep boop beep boop…and come up with the six must-haves for any Super Bowl ad:

• Animals
• Precocious Children
• Homages to famous movies
• Rock ‘n’ Roll
• Ice Cold Beer
• ‘Merica

STEP TWO: The NACHO Index
Now that we used, we promise, a super-science-y method to come up with the essentials, we’re scienced it even further by developing with a sensitive metric designed to measure the awesomeness of a Super Bowl TV spot: The NACHO INDEX.

The tippy-top is a whopping five NACHOs

5 Nachos

Let’s give it a spin by looking at a few from this year’s slate of commercials…

“Declaration of Deliciousness”
2-5 Nachos
What’s more ‘Merican than the iconic bobble-headed burger peddler crossing the Delaware? Nothin’.

“Bold Forever”
4-5 Nachos
ALMOST perfect. It checks just about all the boxes. Animals, precocious children, people in costume, weirdness for the sake of weirdness. But couldn’t they have included some of the Red, White and Blue? Or how ‘bout instead of the generic score in the background, why not go whole-hog and have ex-Grand Funk Railroad guitarist Mark Farner wail on a sweet guitar solo?

Ahhnuld for Mobile Strike
3-5 Nachos
‘Splosions and the quintessential 80s action star–you can’t get any better.

STEP THREE: The PERFECT Spot
Okay, now that we have our NACHO Index calibrated properly, it’s time to make this thing happen…

STEP FOUR: Get real.
Okay–all clownin’ aside, if you want to spend lots of cash on a splashy ad that doesn’t actually say much about, you know, your actual product, that’s cool. But if you really want to get real and actually reach your consumers, we’re here to help. Drop us a line, and we’ll get to work.

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